You're probably going to think I'm crazy...

I think... I mean... I reached a state of zen yesterday afternoon.

I had a brief moment, where everything inside of my head collided and I was laughing and crying and it was like true joy.

No, I was not on drugs or drinking - it just... happened. I wasn't meditating (although I still do that daily), it was just... there... in the most unexpected of places.

Maybe everyone is going to think I've truly lost it now, but I know what it feels like. What happiness is like, happiness without all of that other negative shit that goes on in one's head. It was pure and bright and gone way too fast.

I will probably never experience that again.

But it makes me realize how petty us human beings can sometimes be. And I can't even promise that I'll stop being so damn petty sometimes. But I think next time I'm griping about some stupid thing, I will look back at this post to remind me.

Be happy with the things you have, not unhappy with the things you don't have.

Could it be so simple?

Back to being un-enlightened...

Apparently, Gavin was on the radio last night talking about the birthday card the official message board fans created for him (it was my idea - I'm so cool... heh, but Katie actually MADE the card, so she's cooler). I didn't hear the interview, but it's supposed to be posted somewhere soon. Anyway, he said it was awesome and is currently hanging up in his tour bus. It has all of our photos on it, so he gets to look at us EVERY day (poor guy... heh).

In other news, if you're not watching "Carnivale" - you are MISSING OUT! That show improves with each episode. I will now be saving up to buy the Season One DVD (available at hbo.com). I have also somehow managed to get into "Unscripted." I guess it's an acting thing. I believe any actor will most definitely appreciate that show.

Anyway, I'm in design-research phase on joeydegraw.net - I still need to purchase the domain name, I'll do that once I have an actual design worked up (I have an idea of what it's going to look like, it's just all in my head right now).